“So this is how liberty dies, with thunderous applause”…
Did I quote the least desirable of the Star Wars trilogies? You bet I did.
Millions of people woke up devastated, disappointed, surprised, and horrified by the re-election of a convicted felon, rapist, and twice-impeached insurrectionist.
Even more troubling is the applause.
The people cheering for this outcome, actively supporting someone whose actions and beliefs undermine the very ideals this country claims to stand for, are a terrifying reminder of how deeply fractured we are. How do we even begin to bridge such a profound divide? How do we move forward when it feels like we are fundamentally at odds on nearly every issue that matters?
As a therapist, I’ve been trained to believe that the personal is political, and therapy is political. I was trained by incredible feminist therapists who taught me that our inner struggles don’t exist in a vacuum—they are deeply intertwined with the world around us. When I look at the political landscape today, it’s impossible to separate the state of the nation from the emotional and psychological turmoil many of us are experiencing. We are not just dealing with a political divide; we are confronting a moral one. How can we hope to find common ground when the very idea of “truth” seems to be up for debate? When basic principles like human rights, justice, and equality are being redefined, or outright dismissed, by those in power?
I am not immune to the anger, frustration, and even fear that many of us feel. The results of the 2024 election made one thing abundantly clear: a significant portion of this country is willing to overlook, at best, and outright embrace at worst, racism, misogyny, xenophobia, authoritarianism, and a litany of other harmful ideologies because of a desire for power. And the most disturbing part? They aren’t just silent about it—they’re celebrating it.
I believe in the power of dialogue. I believe in the potential of understanding, of empathizing with others even when their perspectives seem impossible to relate to. But this is different. We are dealing with a political movement that thrives on misinformation, that seeks to dismantle the very institutions meant to protect vulnerable communities, and that actively promotes hate and division. There’s no “healing” from that if we don’t first acknowledge it for what it is.
Healing Starts with Accountability
I’ve heard many people argue for reconciliation, for finding some middle ground with the people who support candidates like the one who was re-elected. But here’s the problem: when your political platform is built on lies, bigotry, and cruelty, the idea that we should “move on” or “find common ground” becomes not only misguided, but dangerous. To suggest that we can simply “forgive and forget” without holding people accountable for their actions is to diminish the real harm that has been done. Accountability is not optional—it is a moral imperative.
We are not in a moment where we can afford to be soft or complacent. We are not dealing with a policy disagreement over taxes or healthcare. We are dealing with a systematic attempt to dismantle democracy, to stoke fear and division, to subjugate marginalized communities, and to normalize violence and corruption at the highest levels of government. To entertain the idea that we should “move past” these issues is to ignore the lessons of history. Every authoritarian regime started with a “compromise,” with a willingness to tolerate injustice in the name of unity. This is how democracy dies—not with thunderous applause, but with silence, with apathy, with an unwillingness to confront the damage being done.
The Cost of Tolerance for Intolerance
It’s easy to say we should all just “get along” in the name of peace. But at what cost? What are we truly sacrificing when we tolerate those who are openly complicit in undermining the rights and safety of others? Let’s be clear: the rise of this political movement is not about differing views on policy. It’s about a rejection of human dignity. It’s about denying the humanity of Black and Brown people, LGBTQIA+ individuals, immigrants, women, and anyone who doesn’t fit into their narrow, exclusionary vision of what America should look like. It’s about empowering people who, by their words and actions, have made it clear that they would rather tear down democracy than build a just and equitable society.
To pretend that there’s a moral equivalence between supporting democracy and supporting authoritarianism is dangerous and naive. To call for “unity” without addressing the fact that one side of the political spectrum is actively dismantling the very structures that allow for democracy to function is to enable the worst impulses of those in power. I can not stand by and pretend that we can come together while one side is actively seeking to erase the progress we’ve fought so hard for. Reconciliation with those who are bent on eroding civil rights is not the path forward. Fighting for justice, equity, and truth is.
No, We Don’t Need “Both Sides”
One of the most frustrating aspects of modern political discourse is the false equivalency that often gets drawn between the left and the right. As if, for the sake of balance, we have to consider both sides equally, regardless of how destructive one side might be. No, we don’t. We do not have to entertain arguments from people who support a system that actively harms others. When we give space to those whose policies prioritize the powerful over the vulnerable, we are complicit in that harm.
I understand the appeal of trying to understand “where the other side is coming from.” But some things are non-negotiable. When people are advocating for stripping away access to healthcare, for denying the right to abortion care and choice, for supporting policies that perpetuate systemic racism, and for undermining the integrity of our elections—there is no “understanding” to be had. There is only resistance.
The notion of “both sides” being equally valid is a falsehood that has been weaponized to normalize harmful behavior. It lets people off the hook for actions that are, at their core, anti-democratic and rooted in hate. We cannot operate in good faith with people who want to halt progress and whose values are the antithesis of fairness and equity. We cannot compromise with those who are actively working to drag us back to an era where only a select few had access to power, wealth, and freedom.
We Cannot Normalize Hate
The challenge, then, is not just to resist—it's to actively push back against the normalization of hate. This is not about having a civil conversation with people who believe in white supremacy, women not having rights, or the criminalization of marginalized groups. This is about standing firm in our values, in our commitment to justice, to equality, and to the belief that the future of this country should be a place where everyone can thrive, not just those who fit a narrow, exclusionary mold.
It’s not enough to oppose the system—we must dismantle it, piece by piece, and build something better. We can’t allow ourselves to be swayed by the rhetoric of unity that ignores the real, tangible harm being done. We have to reject the idea that we must “move on” from this moment, because to do so would be to allow the systems of oppression that have always existed in this country to continue unchecked.
This is not about healing for the sake of harmony. This is about fighting for a future where all people can live free from fear, discrimination, and violence. This is about protecting the democracy that so many have fought for, and ensuring that it is never again jeopardized by those who would see it destroyed.
In the face of this moment, we must resist with everything we have—not just for ourselves, but for the generations that will come after us. The work ahead will not be easy, but it is necessary. And in the end, it is the only path that leads to true justice and freedom.
So no, I’m not here to offer a path to reconciliation with those who seek to harm others. I’m here to say: it’s time to choose a side—and that side must be one that stands against hatred, against division, and against the erosion of basic human decency.
This is the part where I usually give a call to action about reaching out for help if you need it. Of course, if you are looking for individual or couples counseling and therapy in Towson, MD or virtual therapy or counseling in the state of Maryland or New Jersey, fill out the contact form on our website. You can find more about us and pick a therapist who fits your needs. However, therapy might not be what you need. You might need to be angry or sad and find a community to support you in the other ways. Know that whatever you do, whatever you need, your feelings about this election are valid. We're in for a scary time ahead, find your people, we need each other now more than ever.
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